christ maneuver

house stands still
for bits

drill into thought --
wrest favor

at pulling straws,
we manage

to swim through
idea blocks

into the sky:
sex flight

above it all
gourds operate

cross the streams
bad egon

You Obtained +2 Terror Shorts

You obtained the +2 Terror Shorts
You earned 27 pieces of failure
Omarion gained a level!
Sadness increased
Popularity decreased
Ability to talk to women decreased
Became strong vs. robots

(a long day of) robots

there in the valley,
we rested atop a melted face
of modern classics

from within the compound
they emerge

i comb my fingers slightly
through its
titanic hair

oil
shared

welshing on a bet
made in 1903 by people
we are not even related
to

the robot; majestic and free
able to scale small people
in a single failure

when technology and emotion
collide
nobody wins

first post

crosswise centroid

in the shadow of celebrity
making safety-scissor paste-ups
and weeping hysterically

regulate the limbs

in the development downwind
riding broken ambulances
and grabbing at landmines

educate in silence

in reference to your email
taking a running jump
into an elevator shaft

terminate my employment

stellar waffle

ambulance damage
comin out the planet
like your face out a cannon
killin flies at the galleria
cold step to diarrhea
malaria beats at the wilderness forest
illness up all your grillness
the stillness
motherfuckin energy billness
a person just killed us
living in a building
on the outskirts of consciousness
i stole this wheelbarrow
and we sold it for a pile of dust
wilderness trust
on the microphone is crust
so like damn
how you like me back then
back when
my head was attached to a whale
attached to fail
destined to make it hail
my shit is now on sale

you just ran out of hit points, bitch

brain-trouble

we sat and sipped
our bowl of hair
there

i think about juice
you think about new jack city
we think about
it's fresh

slim winds blow our
mouths astray
six pack of scissor light
empty and crushed
our foreheads bruised

aching sun sets behind
a wall of information
could not think straight

and there we left our minds
in a smoking pile
covered in failure
the future awaits
tiny and uproarious
and still

that was why i was hot,
earlier

sensitive plant

wafflemaker
sensitive plant
punch it until it is destroyed
blueberry bunch of, OK
yeah bro
we are wafflemaker and this song is called
maximum waffle output
punch it until it is destroyed

PICK SLIDE INTO SOLO!!!

(all rights reserved)

a time for bears

a weekend
of bears

and as we walked
from the chez artiste
to the car

bears

descended on golden ropes
angel breath
hope sprang internal

they called to us
in heathen dulcet tones
"fear not
fucking humans"

we took their crusted paws
we danced in the rain
we wept together
cleansed
renewed
overjoyed

in the time of bears we
realized
our true motives
our actual purposes
lives were changed
that day

climbing trees
in an eternity
of ursal bliss

bears

popular

come darkness
envelop new birth
style crisis

summon we
the grim bringer
of ennui

laughing so
terrified and brave
cold front

bestial frenzy
black our nails
scraping by

end comes
blank and warm
we're chosen

lost time

A.

arranged on stilts on hills
beckon now the crash
call of peristalsis
deliver us
exeunt

B.

rictus terrifying and wholly bleak
shines through the gloom
topples our bravery
underneath now --
victory

C.

kept
quiet
keep
stop
quiet

D.

for all the new cognoscenti
gifted in their sneers
hell, gaping, awaits
invisible, cold,
justified

E.

lost to the coming age
marooned on conceptual islands
never looking back
omit ourselves
posthaste

hangblow 2: armed and fabulous

mirth
corruption
all aboard

anthony wong in
ebola syndrome

o darth
o bilirubin raft
o and were i deigned to rest upon laurels such as this
o all right

we just laughed
left
bereft of brain
impulsive and beautiful in our
drained pitchers

hanging from the wire
building buildings
only ever go there to see how it all works

we blow away
we blow toward
insolvent and variant and insubordinant and
mellifluous
melismatic wonder on spaceships headed for the works
hang us already

Illegal Action (Has Been Performed)

pants aloft
Haruk!
there a yon worthing
getn head from a b'ar
A B'AR
luna tinker
zero improvisational worthing
you make,
you become nearl
you think nearl
someone approach the bench
babar
B'Ar
Hey face
There a, there is a
NURT
NURT B'AR

Saving up amounts of cash to put into a mobile vagina factory
Do dishes/walk dog
Takin class field trip to the ol nurt bar
Worthing a giant prasticis
Amending dong units
Wheelies off a blade made of face
For Jesus

B'AR, There a b'ar in thur forest
Inna up all up in a thur over thur (what it do what it do)
Festive and bromous
Among a weed carriage
Restart?
Shut down?

I Just Rolled a 20 Charisma

Nubian lapel
Stork fighter
A incorrection

Gelatinous: blessed
Climbing stance
Avian delights
Neatly folded inadequacy

Hey current events
Hey absolute repellent evil
Hey that's evil

Window blanket
Monstrous compendium
2112

Staving off the thrills of going downhill
Basement missive
The perfect ones
Halberd
Halcyon
Hallo

Crawl back inside
Direct deposit
Afterbirth
Loss
Running out of
Skin

Welded and bleak

max hair

Isn't
Give place
Give location.
We will need
It
Digits America
You're losing pieces

This scalp is optional
stop-loss/max-hair/inescape
Lop it all off lop it all off
All off all off all off
Off off offering
Ring

You are correct
You are always correct____ OK
You are always correct____ Yes
You are always correct____ Sure
You are always correct____ Sounds good
You are always correct____ I agree
You are always correct____ Definitely

Definitely no hair in the driveway
Definitely
Max it max it max it max it max it You are always correct
Digit hair
Isn't
Isn't
Isn't
File's corrupt

magnus chlumsky: an iteration

mag
mmmmmm

magnus (as we came arou
nd the cornr(as we
MAG

MAGNUS

as as as as as as as as as as as as
we we we we we we we we we c.
chlrrrrrrrrrrrr NaCl HCl
chlumsky

(

(poem >take dagger >walk door
>open door >check inventory

You are in a small room with no windows. >_

MAGNUS MAGNUS MAGNUS
CH
mmmmag
Hey try stabbing yourself with this here knife
Hey
Hey Magnus

>_ Use bucket
>_ Check inventory

Chlumsky
Take
Take
Take
Take
Tak
Tk
K

Potassium
Chloride
Chlumsky


magnus

WIREFEST

BLATANT ANIMAL
PHONING IN
REPULSIVE CRUD
WEIGHT OF GLOCK
PARENTLY
MISSIVE FROM
YOUR JUTTING MOUTH
BLOW SYRUP
ACHE FOR BRAIN
WHOLLY BARNACLE
BUT MERELY DRAINED
BLATANT MAN
ANIMAL MAN
SAVE THE CLOCKTOWER
FEST OF WIRE
BLEED
REPAIR
INDICT
BARK

Michael Dudikoff

We threw stars
Into their face
We unleashed
Poetic fury
We toppled the empires
Of corrupt wizards
Donning our robust
And wind-sleek garb
We crept stealthily
Through the endless night
We emerge from shadows
Crushing evil flat

Fearsome
Godlike
Mane of wonder
Dudikoff
Your time has come
Dudikoff
Stand and fight
Your arts
Martial
Biceps fully raging
Fully

Dudikoff
We choose you

dead recluse

gathering dust and cash
blanketed in the front room
as spiders idly watch from corner perches
royalty checks accrue
magazine cards dot the landscape
the phone
rings

barry manilow descends to earth
on a solitary golden shaft of lightning
singing songs we knew
to be
awesome

a fever dream
asdfghjkl

self-evident and evidently self
writing an ending
rewiring
writing
face comes off? face goes on:
yanni slams a d minor chord in your living room

recluse spiders out of the corner
playing a very, very small
violin
self-evident
self shaped
face
awesome
dead

Check Out The Employee Photo Directory

Check it out

quaid (quaid)

a mart
a snake waiting for you under a tarp
a carp
a crayon colored like failure
a marlin carved up on the dumbwaiter
a giant crevasse under electronics boutique
a partial freak
a replica of randy quaid
a rubber raid
a flower made of death
a certificate of no breath
a super sweet 86
a castle built from dick
a click away from savings of up to 109%
a raise in rent
a dent
a front of hollow faces
a broken, dennis, cuisinart
a mart

high, a waffle

...high, a waffle
beneath the icy tendrils
of the frozen sun

andre from the real world
rides by on a three-seat
unicycle

overland park USA
olympia USA
montpelier USA

we stand on the tense shoulders
of misled giants
hungry for antagony

waiting out the business
wading out to mid-sea
wallowing in a tank of pure mist

...there, a waffle
sheds its grace silently on the masses
now, walk it out

Becoming Awesome

Falling off a roof of Pizza Haus
In the dead of noon
Shoes of pure sunshine
Laces tight
Rowing a viking ship across Cherry Creek
Collar popped
Dressed for G-d
We climb the lowest hills
Only to dig holes in our shins
Ice cream sneakers blazing
"Who is Larry Busch,"
We cry into the open wounds
And stylishly fret
Among chosen weeds
Staff held in highest regard
Towards the bloody mark
Malted and furious
Lichen spilling out of our lungs
Bruised
Beer-battered
Imperious and primed to thrust
We become awesome

alive presidents

idly by, idly standing by
freely down, freely using down
considerately over, considerately mulling over
broadly there, broadly appearing there
dully through, dully prancing through
quizzically above, quizzically sinking above
wholly around, wholly sleeping around
avidly of, avidly weeping of
joyously into, joyously murdering into
cruelly with, cruelly licking with
lustily at, lustily hovering at
emptily before, emptily kneeling before
freakishly during, freakishly blank during
visually from, visually bleeding from
finally after, finally breaking after

wheat boner

fabulous
wheat boner
avenge me

beard of Christ
beard of wheat

you scrupulous vato
you beast of quinine
you tonic maximizer

elephantine, quarrelsome;
sick brah

fluorescent
wheat boner
have mercy

moist business

flakes of weight
terminal crunch face
stab robot

polemic pandemic
failure maneuvers
scarred polenta falling out of a sky

hey

licking trunk
sufferage camp
giant men beating you about the lungs

yarn business
moist and yawning
fuel for partisan crabs

no

who wants to go stomp the yard